Thoughtful Greetings,

As I sit here and reflect on 2016 I am reminded of the importance of several personal events that transpired in my life over the course of this year. My life changed dramatically and I am making it my highest priority to adjust to a new reality and to move forward into a new year with grace, courage, compassion, and an open heart.

The early part of 2016 was filled with blissful anticipation of my son’s upcoming wedding.  I had waited a long time for him to find the perfect one to love and to wed and my excitement was hard to contain … it was bubbling over my somewhat serious persona.  I have believed for a very long time that whom you choose to marry is one of the most important decisions of your life.

Some people take a leap of faith early in life and some linger for years before tying the knot. Either way, there is hope that love is enough to carry you through all of life’s changes and adventures and that you share many of the same goals and desires in life.

Weddings are magical events filled with love, hope and promise as two people declare their love for each other expressively in the  presence of family and friends with a glorious celebration.  There are greetings and toasts and there is most always dancing among the food, flowers, champagne and excitement of this special day.  Big hearts and big smiles abound as everyone shares in the celebratory mood of the beautiful life awaiting the bride and groom. 

At the end of the evening no one wants it to end as friendships are rekindled, new families forged and life feels exciting and the future bright. My son’s springtime marriage to a darling girl I’m happy to call our daughter-in-law was a highlight and a milestone of my life and my happiness and bliss carried over until the summertime.  

One day in early July I unexpectedly received the most devastating news that changed my life in an instant as I was notified that my only daughter had suddenly passed away.  We were many states away and my feelings of helplessness and grief were overwhelming.  

Life became a blur as my mind was unable to provide comfort to my broken heart.  The loss of a child is a physical experience and my heart ached at this separation from my grown daughter.

My mind swirled with memories, emotions and details of tasks I must complete for her and of her childhood, young adult years, addiction struggles and her resilient personality.  

For the first few months I lived in between the two worlds of heaven and earth and although I was dealing with the truth that her struggle was over, it seemed like someone let all the air out of my life. The day you realize your loved one is no longer struggling but your grief journey has just begun is a chilling one and although I had already experienced the loss of my first daughter at a few weeks old, my parents, aunts, uncles & cousin as well as numerous friends nothing compares to the loss experienced in a parent adult child relationship.

Preparing for and hosting my daughter’s Celebration of Life on the beach in Key West was an amazing experience of love, compassion and support that touched my heart in immeasurable ways. I am grateful for the blessings shown to me during this year of change in my life. 

Through the grace of prayers, the loving support of my husband, son and family, music, nature, friendships and my continued connection with my daughter, my heart has been uplifted and peace and joy are seeping in once again. 

Thank you for being a part of my journey to wholeness, I send my love and heartfelt wishes that you may live in peace and prosperity in 2017.

Love & Light,

Nancy

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